Many young people of yesteryears did a lot of things as a matter of habit.
They opened doors for other people. If someone opened doors for them, they graciously acknowledged the kind act by saying “Thank you” with a smile.
When a person wanted to get someone’s attention, he would politely wait for his turn. If it were an urgent matter, he would discreetly signal to get that person’s attention. In class, a student would raise his hand if he had something to say, or he would say “Excuse me, Ma’am” respectfully.
Talking to you also means looking at you straight in the eye, giving you his full attention. Adults were respectfully addressed as “Ma’am,” or “Sir.”
Many parents want to instill in their children similar “old-fashioned” manners – manners that reflect respect, refinement and good values.
You can raise your children to do all these things. You can raise them to appreciate important values – a high regard for hard work, respect for others and the self-respect, which usually comes from being independent and earning your keep.
You can motivate your children by showing them that you believe in them and have high expectations of them. You can instill integrity, discipline, honor and respect. You can teach them traditional values.
You can take your lead from the culture system that all forms of martial arts adhere to. Students of Jiu-Jitsu, Karate, Judo and other forms of martial arts respect the values that teachers from one generation to another seek to instill in their students.
Students hold their teacher (trainer, instructor, or Sensei), gym (Dojo or academy), and the martial arts culture in high esteem. This is the way students are taught – from generations past until the present – and the traditional values live on even today.
You can teach your kids to be more appreciative of the things you do for them. You can make them realize that getting them the latest gadgets, giving them reasonable allowance, or footing the bill for their extracurricular activities does not instantly mean that you are doing these solely because of responsibility. It is mainly because you love them and want the best for them.
Moreover, avoid demonstrating your love to your kids through material things. It is actually more important to spend quality time with them, so you can talk to them earnestly and instill the values in the yesteryears to them. Set real and loving interaction with your kids. By showing them respect and making them feel important, you teach them to do the same thing to others. I’m always reminded of the 5 words to never forget. “You, Can, Never, Not, Teach”. Plain and simple. Everything you say or do children learn from.
Make them realize the importance of communication. Offer your support and take pride of even their little achievements. If they do wrong, correct them in such a way that they will know exactly what they did wrong. They should be inspired to avoid committing the same mistake again and emulate the good habits of the youth in the past.
Talk to them earnestly about how they should behave, so you can cultivate good behaviors in them. When your kids feel that you believe in them, they will most likely believe in themselves, too. They will take pride in trying to live up to your expectations.
Contributor: Renshi Adam McCauley
Your Neighborhood Martial Art’s Instructor.
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